Squirrels With No Tails

On a beautiful island in the middle of the ocean exists a tribe of squirrels.  The squirrels are all fat and happy.  They sing, dance, and play every day.

When a baby squirrel is born, they perform a ritual where they name and cise them.  "'Cise' - what's that?" little Johnny Squirrel asks.  

Doc Squirrel replies, "That's where we remove the after-body."  

"Why do we do that?" little Johnny Squirrel asks.  Doc Squirrel replies, "It's cleaner, reduces chances that it will cause us problems, and our leader told us to remove it."  Doc Squirrel continues, "Besides, it just gets in the way."

One day a ship arrives.  It has individuals on board that look just like those that are on the island, with one exception: They have big bushy after-bodies!

Little Johnny Squirrel is the first to meet them.  He asks, "What are those big things at the end of your body?"  

One of the visitors replies, "You mean our tails?"  

Little Johnny Squirrel responds, "Is that the same as your after-body?"

The visitor responds, "I guess you could call it that."

Little Johnny Squirrel says, "We remove those from our babies."

The visitor responds, "Why would you do that?"

Little Johnny Squirrel echos all of the things Doc Squirrel told him.

The visitor responds, "We don't have much trouble with all of those things and when we do, we just take care of it."  The visitor continues "Besides, it actually helps us."

Little Johnny Squirrel says, "How does it help you?"

The visitor says, "Well, it makes it easier for us to jump and keep our balance."

Little Johnny Squirrel retorts, "No!  I don't have my after-body and I can jump and balance JUST FINE!"

The visitor responds, "I'm sure you can, but can you jump and balance as well as I?"

Little Johnny Squirrel retorts, "I'm not going to compete to find out, that's just silly!"

The visitor asks Little Johnny Squirrel, "Do you know what cognitive dissonance is?"

Little Johnny Squirrel says, "No, what is that?"

The visitor explains, "It's when a person is presented with information that conflicts with the information they already have in their brain."

Little Johnny Squirrel says, "Are you saying that is what I have?"

The visitor explains, "It seems so."

Little Johnny Squirrel exclaims, "My parents, ancestors, and leaders wouldn't be removing it if it wasn't a good thing!"

The visitor responds, "I'm sure they wouldn't, but, do you know what Stockholm Syndrome is?"

Little Johnny Squirrel responds, "No, what is that?"

The visitor explains, "It's when one has positive feelings, like love for someone who harmed them.  It's very difficult to accept that someone you love and supposedly loves you would cause you harm, isn't it?"

Little Johnny Squirrel responds, "So, they were harmed by the ones that love them and they were also harmed by the ones that love them; it's just a circle that goes back to the beginning of time!"

The visitor responds, "Exactly!"  The visitor goes on "So, don't be upset at those who removed your tail, just end the cycle with you."

Little Johnny Squirrel, in excitement, exclaims, "I have to go tell my parents!  They are going to be thrilled that they don't have to remove after-bodies, I mean tails, any longer!"

A little while later, Mayor Squirrel tracks down the visitor and exclaims "What poo did you fill Little Johnny Squirrel's head with?!"  Mayor Squirrel goes on "We are just fine without our after-bodies!  We have been removing them forever and we will continue to do so!  Go back to where you came from!" 

The visitors leave out of fear for their lives.

Little Johnny Squirrel attends another ritual where they remove another tail from a baby squirrel all while thinking, "Gosh, I would really like to know what it's like to have my tail!"

*The End*

Oh, were you expecting a happy ending?  Sorry, the adult squirrels weren't brave enough to have an honest conversation.  Fear rules the day.